Goals are these elusive things in our life that we have a sometimes vague notion in the back of our minds. They sit there, in a chair, on a porch, and scream at us as we come zooming by on our bike about making too much noise and eventually they fall asleep reading the Sunday funnies. Sitting there, doing nothing, a goal is nothing more than an annoyance. A slap to the face for your day in the sun, thinking of nothing and enjoying life for the moment we are here.

Lately, I’ve been feeling a bit depressed. I shouldn’t be, things in life have been going, actually, pretty swell. But in my head I hear that old s.o.b. yelling at me, “Get your ass into gear! That book won’t write itself! Or how’s that gaming design coming along? Gonna get that podcast cut yet or would you rather post it next Christmas? How’s about that short film? Have you even outlined the comic? Why aren’t you building that shelving unit you said you were going to do?”

This nagging, annoying, a-hole is something I deal with on an almost daily basis. It has come to the point that I feel like I will never, truly, be done with anything; and that is a terrifying feeling. I always say that I am never gonna stop working, and this is true, but I need to stop worrying about work that isn’t here yet or is in progress. I feel as if I am taking these tiny steps everyday and I am seeing people blow past me with their ability to skip down the lane.

Damnable long legging jerks!

How do you even go about fixing this? Thinking these thoughts?

Firstly, talking about it helps. To God, your spouse, the dog or the infinite universe that doesn’t care about you, but you have to start somewhere! Getting the thoughts out of your head and away helps big time. It keeps you centered just a bit more so that life doesn’t seem so bad or that you’re behind.

Second, do the things! I have started most of that laundry list above, I just have to finish some of it. It will take time, yes, but I am going to be check marking the crap out of that list. Remember, when you hear about someone’s ‘immediate’ success, it takes years or months of work on something that may not do anything at all. All projects are a gamble, some are safer gambles than others, but a gamble to be sure.

Third, stop being dumb. Really, that last part helps a lot. Just keep in mind that what you do matters, even if it fails. If it fails, then you’ve still finished it. You’ve still done it and that says something. Just keep in mind, you can give up on books, video games, or TV shows, but projects need an ending; and sometimes that ending is even a happy one.

My first post of 2016

Hello ladies and gentlemen of the Internet, it is I!

“Wait, it’s the 25th of January, how are you just now posting and are so handsome?” You might be thinking to yourselves, maybe not so much that last part, but still, a man can dream…

The reason why I haven’t been so active here is because over the course of December, as we closed out 2015, I came to realize that I was working a lot and not spending as much time with my wife. With every New Year, you set yourself almost the same goals:

  • Write a novel
  • Get published
  • Finish something
  • Learn how to be a blacksmith

And while those are worthwhile goals, many of us get caught up in the minutiae of trying to achieve these goals and zone out on everything else. You write everyday, post everyday, engage your audience, but the ability to be present with your loved ones is usually not a goal people set for themselves.

Except that’s what I set for myself this year.

My wife and I are expecting our first kid, this will literally be the last year it is the two of us and I want to make the most of this by sitting on the couch and binge watching The Flash and reading. Many would think that we would travel and such, and we are going to do that, but the important part of any relationship is being there for the small moments that are forgotten or blur together in the great links between the show pieces that stick in the fabric of our memories. Those small pieces are what help build up to the larger, more grandiose moments that every movie or TV show makes you think should happen on an almost daily basis.

And it was something that I was sorely missing out on last year. So, I decided to still rock the shit out of my writing and creative projects, but do them in concentrated bursts. Does this mean the blog is dead? No, the blog lives. Long live the blog!

It does mean that whatever work I push out will be higher quality rather than quantity. I will be writing everyday in February moving forward, but I am going to be making time for my favorite human in my life everyday as well, my wife.

P.S. If you vomit because of this post, I understand, but do not care.